My spirit is telling me that I left the tribe a very long time ago. But, what astounds me is that I am sure from birth that it was never part of my existence. OK…. so you may be wondering what exactly am I talking about “The Tribe”….Literally this is not survivor! Or is it hmmmmm……………………. Let me explain as I was listening to one of my many mind blowing cd’s (thx Dr. WD) for some reason “the tribe” stood out and very clear to me. OMG how could this resonate so loudly in my head looping around as if it was a broken recorded the tribe, the tribe, the tribe. Ok I get it! As I began to put pen to paper the words began to flow……
As if the brightest light was turned on and for the entire world to see!!!
T H E T R I B E
It flashed again in my mind! I began to smile because I know how the tribe affects or non affects my life. From the moment of life outside of the womb I was immediately thrust into a tribe, whether I wanted to be or not. From what I gather is that this tribe is suppose to feed you, comfort you, protect you and make you feel as if you belong that you are a important vital part. In my earlier years I did everything right “so I thought” to be a member. I followed the set rules well actually two sets of the tribe’s rules and society. As I began to see that a lot of things that pertained to the tribe were not appealing to me. I had my own ideas, thoughts, and segments of happiness that I wanted to share.
As the chief of the tribe internally and externally spoke in a thunderous voice reminding me that my thoughts were not needed! My voice was silent! For in fact if you go against this quasi entity then you will find yourself alone, ostracized. Basically, if you are not a part; you are a void, nonexistent a non entity.
It was at that time that I entered another form of tribal oneness otherwise known to mere mortals as the “school system”. Gosh this was so brand new to me! I was so excited because I have never been a part of this before! So many new members, different hues, different dialects. But, what I saw was astounding even more chiefs existed. As my mind was taken on many journeys I wanted to be the best and I knew I would be ok and not be suppressed………………WRONG!!!
I was ostracized! For excelling, being smart, being me, my voice; just all in all exercising my intellectual being. And not just by the chiefs but from the ones who were considered as my peers the minions! But, what really opened my eyes was my very own family (the tribe). This daily exercise was a never ending ritual! Each and every minute, hour, day, month, year! As I tried to go my own way to explore, someone would always call me out in the tribal meetings that were held.
I was always asked why?
Why can you be like?
Why do you want so much more?
But why do you want to leave the tribe?
And finally I was told this …….. You will not make it with your views! You need to be like us. You will just have to accept what is before you because that is all that you are going to get!
Stop daydreaming because it will never be.
Because I was not tribalanized I took those thoughts in my head and put them very far back because I knew that there was so much more that I could experience and incorporate into my world.
A world that I was worthy of no matter what the other members believe or said!
At that very point I decided that I am no longer needed and kicked myself out of the tribe. Even though I was told that the membership was lifelong until I die kind of membership! But you know what I will take my changes and go out into the world as one. In hopes of finding more like me my search will be a lifelong endeavor!
It feels good to have finally voided myself of that segment of my life. A new process, a way of thinking! Do I have fear well maybe a teeny tiny type but not FEAR that would hold me back.
For I am my own Island
And it is named The Isle of DAWN
